Thursday, July 31, 2008

Hit me Baby one more time

So when do you know that you’re ready to have baby number 2?

Or if you want to have baby number 2?

Because it was entirely conceivable that it would be impossible for us to conceive again. We hit the jackpot once; maybe we were meant to be a family of three. Our boy was our wonder; a beautiful, loving little character, who had us enthralled from the moment he was born. Shouldn't we have been so happy to be so blessed?



But still, the desire for another child gnawed. At me.

So when?

Is it when you realize that your biological clock is ticking on over drive?

Is it when you see this ...


And he shares this with you...


And he cracks you up with this...


that you realize that your baby is growing up quickly in front of your very eyes…


so quickly that you want to get that "baby feeling" back?

I took a deep breath and wondered if we could indeed do it again. Only now it was a couple years later, I was a couple years older. And perhaps not so much wiser.

I love rollercoasters, I really do, but this was flippin’ ridiculous.

Oh boy, here we go again ...

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

"Wordless" Wednesday


(shhhhh, Mommy, I need to concentrate...



... I'm blogging, twittering, plurking....)

(PS. Am now on a blog high... first Blogher and now Alltop?
Guess I've really got people fooled, eh?)

For other wordless check it

Monday, July 28, 2008

Mad for Mad Men

Hot flashes and heart palpitations... and not because I'm just winded from Bodyjam or menopausal, just yet...it's something called a Jon Hamm.

I know, I'm late to the party but they just started showing Mad Men here in Canada. And he's my new addiction. I've only watched 3 complete episodes (DVD for Season 1 is out right now, thank goodness). But hooked, I am, utterly and completely.

I'm all over Don Draper. Sure, his breath probably reeks of ashtray, and he couldn't get it up last night.. but he looks great in a wifebeater T (or more PC undershirt) ...and his voice?

Intelligent with a hint of something deliciously hidden underneath.

Mystery.

Gotta love that on a Sunday night.

Move over McDreamy.




(image from slate.com)

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Weekly Winner #29



Scenes from my garden...



Holy cauliflower, Batman! (no, didn't grow it; bought it at a farm)


My Soccer Star


WWWF



She melts me...


The "Circle" of Thomas


Shiny happy Mommy with her fashion plate girlie (check out the bicycle socks!) For other Weekly Winners check out the home of Sarcastic Mom

(and you know what? YOU should join us...)

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Super Random Saturday

This post is going to go all over the place. Because we're now officially on...






so my brain doesn't have to work so hard. Not that it ever does, most days, at least it feels that way. Should be interesting when I start to do some work in the fall...

Hubby is off for a few weeks; we'll see if he can stick to it and not check his crackberry overly much in the next little while. Perhaps if I just keep the kids after him round-the-clock that might do the trick.

I'm not great at these random thingy's, usually trying to carefully craft each post with brilliant precision (stop laughing), but it's Saturday morning, and this is what I feel like.

For breakfast:



Yes, Japanese pound cake from a Chinese bakery, likely made with pure lard.

Perfectly healthy, while I make my girl eat this:



Let's hope she manages to get a few flakes down without acting like I'm force feeding her fish food (but I suppose that's what they sort of look like). We don't want the drama of "Constipation the Miniseries" that happened earlier this week to go into reruns.

Other news on the girl front, well, here's her new sleeping buddy. (Never understood why anyone would think a RAT would be good stuffed animal material, but then I suppose my daughter is just that market...)



Hopefully her taste in sleeping partners improves with age.

This is the worst time for me to be having that type of breakfast, but I'm hangover free after a night imbibing 4 mojitos and fistfuls of Lays potato chips. I suppose this is what happens when I'm suffering from Bodyjam withdrawal. Not going to gym = pig out on all the junk in the house.

Yes folks, because I went a bit overboard on the last couple of sessions at the gym, my back feels like I've been playing...

24/7 for about a week. I'm forgetting that I don't have a 20-year old body anymore. It's fun to play with the 20 year olds, but the body is good at reminding me that it ain't all that any longer. Oy.

What will we be doing on vacay? Not a whole heck of a lot. A few day trips with the kids, stuff around the house, we still need to get the kitchen finally, finally finished because in addition to more Cowbell, we need a light in here....



And a garage sale is likely in order ... ugh...

I'll still be around, but likely posting sporadically (I know you don't believe me, but I'll give it a try, honestly I will!)

Have a great Saturday!

Thursday, July 24, 2008

"I wanna be a rock star"

The last post about my boy, well, I was concerned about raising a quitter. An individual who would be afraid to try anything new; be paralyzed by fear of the unknown.

I may have overreacted to my own internal neuroses.

Turns out the boy wants to be FAMOUS.

In the last few months of school, he'd been asking me the occasional question about acting. And about being on TV. This past year he has made a few in-class presentations, and really enjoyed working on the class "skit" for both the spring concert, and his French class. It has always been very casual, this questioning, just general curiosity.

A couple of weeks ago I spotted a tiny ad in the paper, to announce an open casting call for a boy who was of a visible ethnicity, between the age of 8 - 11, under 4 ft 11, who was athletic and outgoing. Hmm, sounded like some kid that I know.

The production company was looking for a boy to play a friend of this precocious carrot top, for an upcoming new TV series.

My boy used to LOVE "This is Daniel Cook" when he was about 5. Daniel got too old to continue the role, and the series continued with another cutie who reminds me a lot of the little G. To be honest, other than how cute Daniel looked, I found him to be a little bit wooden, especially after comparing him to Emily Yeung. She's a little firecracker, personality just shines from her ... a total natural. In any case, I wouldn't think Daniel is suffering much after moving on, as they are now producing TV shows specifically for him.

Shortly after finding this ad, I asked L if he was interested in trying out for a TV series starring Daniel Cook.

To my astonishment, he said "Yes, will I be famous?"

To which I replied: "Well, I suppose if you got the part, people might recognize you."

And then he said: "Sure, why not. That would be cool! Will it be like American Idol or So You think you Can Dance,? With nasty judges with English accents?"

Well, I didn't know about that. But I sent an e:mail, and after they replied, sent a photo of the boy looking athletic, cute, and hopefully about 10 years old. The assistant got back to me and we booked a appointment. She sent us a few lines for him to memorize.

I practiced with him about a dozen times. Not too many times, because he said he didn't want to jinx it by over-practicing. I was impressed by his enthusiasm. He really wanted the part, but at the same time was quite nervous. It was tough; I tried to be as encouraging as possible, but also wanted him to know that if he didn't get the role, it wouldn't be the end of the world. He was, at least on the surface, fairly casual about it. He told me he would do his best, but if he didn't get the part, he could always for something different. HE said that to ME.

On the day of the audition, we went through his lines a couple of more times (with his little sister chiming in every so often, echoing her favourite lines, much to his annoyance). We had a light lunch (he wasn't hungry) and then we headed downtown.

It was about a 40 minute drive, down the congested highway into the city. I hadn't been to that part of town in a long while, this area that many production companies call home. It was fun to be doing something so foreign, going into a world that I knew little about.

[Well, I do know a teeny bit about it. My brother actually had done some modelling and filmed a commercial when he was about 10 years old. And I accompanied him on the Kellogg's cereal commercial shoot, as I was in university at the time and only had one class that day. I'd forgotten that one of my life's goals at that time, was to be a stage mom. Don't know if it's still like that, but the massive spread of food they had for the parents/ agents and the kids themselves was certainly impressive to my impressionable student mind. I think one of the moms at that shoot was mother to "Lucy" in the original Degrassi TV series... but I digress...]

We found the building, and I parked my so-city minivan; then plunked the girlie in the stroller and off we went...



Into the dark hall where another dozen kids were waiting for their turn. Some of these children had resumes and professional photos with them. More importantly, many of the boys had their Nintendo DS's with them, something that my boy, in his nervousness, left at home.

"Noooooooo" he whispered with a smile on his face (it was one of his lines, and he could hear muffled cries from the other room as the kids auditioning were sympathetic to his plight).

Turned out that the wait wouldn't be too long, they were only about 30 minutes behind. Thirty minutes for me to get nervous, but my boy, with the smile on his face, just chatted it up with his "competition", laughing, joking, asking everyone how old they were. There were also girls trying out for the part, something he found quite hilarious, for whatever reason.

When his name was called, he bounded down the hall, quickly passed me his gum (yuck!) and walked into the room closing the door behind him, not even missing a step. I could see him through the frosted glass, and heard him answering the casting director's questions.

"Are you big for your age?" the redheaded woman asked.

"Yup, people think I'm a fifth grader all the time!" smartypants replied.

And then he did his lines, right on cue, enthusiastically and with a smile in his voice. They said thanks for coming and good-bye. On our way out, I asked if they would call. And the assistant said "no, that's it."

So that was it. As we walked back to the car, my boy asked whether I thought he would get the role. Suspecting the answer was "no", I said maybe not, but the important thing was that he tried something new, and he discovered that he liked something new. His mom and dad were so very proud of him. He shrugged his shoulders and said that maybe there'd be a next time.

"By the way, can I take guitar lessons? And when I'm famous, can I drive by the school in a limo?

Sure, rock star, sure thing.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

This just in...

So apparently I DID make it to Blogher.

Who'd 've thunk?

Monday, July 21, 2008

My So-Called Second Life

Earlier in the year, I had thought about attending the BlogHer '08 conference in San Francisco this summer. I even had Ian encouraging me, agreeing that it was a great idea; that it would be good for me to get away on my own for a weekend. Of course, the more I got to know some of the bloggers who were going, the more excited I got for the chance to attend.

As luck would have it, this was the ONLY weekend that Ian would have to work this summer.

So much for the getaway.

I know I probably could have arranged childcare, but I'm a wimp where my kids are concerned. The last time we went away without them, we heard about it for the next few months and the whining that has already started happening about our upcoming anniversary weekend is giving me the most royal ... well, let's just say I'm not good with whining.

(Speaking of whining, I will not go on about how green with envy I was or how disappointed I am about missing an awesome line up of speakers; or how some of my favourite bloggers were there, bloggers who actually sorta "know" little ole me and I am dying to meet IRL, bloggers who did us so proud, even bloggers looking for BlogHim ... I'll just stop it now).

Wanting to be a part of some form of BlogHer action, I stumbled upon the BlogHer in Second Life conference. I had never heard of Second Life before this, and was intrigued. I signed up with the intent of following some of the activities in San Fran.

I didn't have a chance to check it out until Friday, and I wish I had earlier. Because I had no clue what I was doing. I set up my account, my sexy Avatar which of course looked nothing at all like me in person. That was the fun of it. Boob job, great Posh hair and no muffin top to be found, all for free!!! I could also navigate through various islands, build houses, buy land, chat online, see the "world" from different perspectives, SHOP, and even FLY!!!

That is, as long as I got lucky and could figure out how to do what I needed to do to get the most out of the BlogHer in Second Life conference. But unfortunately, once I got to the conference site, it took me a devil of a time to figure out how to get the live stream audio. And then how to actually take a seat at the right side of the SIMS line.

What really fascinated me is that Second Life is in fact another "world". There are several different worlds, islands, and groups; some bloggers even blog in Second Life. My understanding is that some colleges even run courses on there. Virtual reality at an entirely different level. My son has been on Runescape, and getting him off of that game is like pulling teeth. Having had a glimpse of this similar but on a bigger scale concept at Second Life, I can see how it can just suck a person in. Living another reality, as a different person if I so choose to be.

When I did finally get to hear perhaps 15 minutes of the final keynote speakers at BlogHer (Heather Armstrong and Stephanie Klein) before it went back to typing chatter, I had that eureka moment. Like I had finally made it, was actually there, even if it was a virtual world.

Just a minor detail that I was lying face down under the bleachers and could not figure out how to get back up. If that's what I had to do in order to hear Dooce discuss "live" how she had 42,000 comments on one post, and how she reads each and every comment ever posted on her blog, so be it.

At least I "got" to BlogHer this year.

As for Second Life, I think I really need to get a firm grasp of my First life, first.

So onward toward BlogHer '09 we go...

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Weekly Winners #28



"Fireworks" by Little G

Vintage at Courage My Love


Ultimate Green Car


Kensington Stroll


City Cowgirl


Mmmmm, good to the last drop...

For other Weekly Winners check out the home of Sarcastic Mom

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Monday, July 14, 2008

Happy Birthday to the Mui*

Today's a special day. It's the birthday of My Sister. (I liked the song; the lyrics, however, actually would be more likely her singing about me - she's the sweet one, me the acerbic).

I don't post much about my little sister. Not because there's nothing to post about - there most certainly is. Tons. But she is quite the private person, and I respect that.

However, it's getting harder and harder for her to be so private, given her recent professional successes. On top of various accolades that she's received in the last few years in her field of design, she was recently one of the women featured in Toronto's Mille Femmes exhibit as part of the Luminato festival in June.

One of "1,000 artistic, creative and inspiring women from Toronto and their protégés, who embody the passion and heritage of the city."



Yeah, that's her standing under her photo; and the one word she chose to describe herself , "OPTIMISTIC" is perfect. We visited the exhibit after the Father's Day brunch we had as a family in the Richtree restaurant.

Growing up she was a spitfire; and so very driven. Sometimes it's hard to believe she's the same little girl who I considered pesky at one time, who worshipped everything her older sister did. We were and are so very different, but also extremely close. I ended up admiring her adventurous spirit, as she travelled around the globe to pursue her studies and further fine-tune her craft in Europe. But I was ecstatic when she came back home once I had my boy. The pull of family was still strong for her.

To say that I am proud of her is such an understatement. When she told me about this exhibit, I almost jumped out of my seat. She'd just been so busy, she hadn't had time to tell the family, but did want to share it before the exhibit came down! A part of me has just been screaming to post this for the longest while, to shout out to the world how amazingly talented she is.

She's designing buildings and state-of-the-art interiors. Whereas, moi? I can barely draw a straight line (just ask her- I volunteered to help her out during an all nighter in design school and she had to send me home...).

Architect, designer, mother of a very busy almost 1 year old, wife, mentor ... she's covering it all. Astonishingly well. I honestly do not know how she does it, and always with a smile on her beautiful face. All the while thinking about everyone ELSE.

She is making a difference in the artistic landscape of this city.

And this is just the beginning. I bet she'll be taking on the world soon enough.

So here she is again, featured in the "Making of ..." video; you'll catch her at about the 5:12 mark.




Happy Birthday Sis!

*little sister in Cantonese. She thought she'd lose that pet name once little G was born; but no, she's still stuck with it. Because she's the original.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

"Oh they built the ship Titanic..."

I felt a bit of a failure last week. Because it is all about me, o-selfish one.

A while back we signed the boy up for a week of daycamp, with a "major" in golf, and an afternoon of swimming, tennis and soccer. It would be an opportunity for him to explore a new sport, and best of all, he would be going with one of his best friends. Sure, it meant getting up early to catch the bus, but it would only be for a week.

I was so impressed with the organization of the camp, the communication was frequent and they always responded to every question so quickly.

The sun, the play, the friends ... he would LOVE it.

On Day 1, it wasn't surprising that he just wasn't eager. It was something new, there was no school and yet he was being forced out of bed at 7:30 AM after a very late night before. There was no convincing him that it was his fault - that fighting bedtime until he was exhausted at 10:30 PM the previous evening was not such a smart thing after all.

But still, he did it, he got dressed, waited to be picked up and when he saw his friend, off he went.

At 4:30 PM when he was dropped off, the first words out of his mouth were: "It was the worst day of my life!!! The food was horrible, and I only saw B for ONE HOUR!!!"

Gulp. This was going to be a long week.

On Day 2, he woke up again in a terrible mood. He wouldn't eat, he again had been up too late the night before, but he got ready and went again, not convinced that the reassurances I gave him about camp getting better were actually going to be true.

At drop off: "It wasn't much better, Mom. At least the sandwich wasn't soggy; but all we did was hit the ball in tennis. And sit around. Soccer was way easy, not fun at all! But the waterslides were all right (he grudgingly admitted)".

At bedtime the whining would not let up. He was almost in tears. "But I HATE IT!!!!".

On Day 3, a different tactic from Mom. "You don't know how lucky you are, you should be happy to be able to be out playing in the sun, with your friends, learning about sports. There are so many kids who don't have this opportunity. And Mom and Dad are paying a LOT OF MONEY for this so you'd better go and you'd better have fun!"

Desperately seeking solution here. Guilt, maybe that was the answer?

"Okay ..." sighing as he walked out the door.

End of Day 3 - you know the score. "It was awful. It is sooooo boring! I can't stand it! I'd rather stay at home and work on WORKBOOKS all day. Or play with little G. Seriously!!! And it's so, so far away!"

I was butting heads with him. It was annoying the hub, our arguing, whining. We finally got him to bed. And suspected that the underlying root of distress for him was being away from home. Even though it was only a 20 minute drive to camp, he took two buses to get to the golf course. It probably seemed like he was in another town.

So we decided to cancel the rest of the week. It just wasn't worth it. Ian found that some of my own issues were coming out in my arguments with our son. After all, I hated daycamp as a kid, but I had no choice. My parents were both working, and without camp there was nowhere else for me to go. I had to suck it up and in the end came to actually enjoy the camp experience somewhat. It was a life lesson.

I was probably overreacting. But honestly, I thought he should have the fortitude to suck it up and finish the week. If I could do it, he certainly could. But hubs said it should be something he enjoys. It's not like he's quitting school or anything. Point well taken. Still, I felt by cancelling, we had failed.

I don't want to raise a quitter. I want my kids to be exposed to new things, to give themselves a chance to try to succeed before giving up too easily. I'm a perfectionist, almost to the point of being held stagnant by my fears of not succeeding. From a very young age I have been hesitant to try new things lest I not be terribly good at it. I hate failing. I don't like the feeling of failure. But however cliche it is, the learnings from failure are more important than the failure itself.

And that is what I'd like for my kids. I see so much more for them. I don't want them to fail all the time; far from it. It's so much easier to succeed. I wish they could be good at everything.

But obviously they can't be. So at least I'd like them to know that finishing something that you've started is important. It can be so difficult sometimes as a parent. Is this really anxiety that's driving him to avoid this new situation; or is it just blowing smoke at me when all he wants to do is hang around and play video games all day? Do I just not push him hard enough; or will pushing him too far drive him over the edge so he will be unwilling to try any new experiences in the future?

I'm still waiting to see what I will learn from my own "failure" in this scenario. As my kids get older, I suspect I'll continue to be learning more life lessons of my own.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

So should you blog when you're angry?

Probably not. But I'm going to anyway.

You know my last post? Well, here I was, ready to go all lovey-dovey. I had even come up with a solution. Just blog while in the same room with the man if we're watching TV. His show.

But then he went out to watch a movie last night. Without me. (Which, you know, he's certainly entitled to do after a long week at the office).

And when he went out to get a DVD to watch tonight, he brought home the newest Rambo. Because apparently there was nothing else there (he did phone me), and he wanted to watch it. Knowing full well that I HATE those movies. Pretty much spelled the evening out for me, don't cha think?

So I sat down in the family room with him to blog, while screaming emanated from the TV, accompanied by exploding huts and flying, bloodied, Asian bodies littered the screen.

"What are you doing here; if it bugs you so much, why are you sitting there and complaining!" (which I wasn't, complaining I mean). So I picked up my laptop and left the room.

I'll likely regret this post later, but screw it.

I'm keeping it really real.

It's Saturday night, and I'm bloghopping with my boyfriends and girlfriends.

That anniversary weekend better work wonders.

(Edited to add: he paused the show to come pour me more wine; maybe I'll be less mad while drunk?!)

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Blog Confessional



"So, you're not having an online affair or anything are you?"

"WHAT?!! NO!!!! "

"Because if you were, we could work through it. I would work through it with you..." **

"What would make you think that, anyway?! As if I would do that, there's no one else."

"Well, why else would you be up until 1:30 AM so often. Makes me wonder".

Awwwww, sh*t. The things that a little drinking will unleash in the wee hours of a Sunday morning.

Catching up on blogs, plurking, buzzing, getting back to internet speed after being on holiday ... it's started to affect my marriage. Not a good thing. Despite the time difference factor that was keeping me up later at night, it was still not a good excuse.

So, if you haven't already noticed, the posts will not be as frequent over the next little while.

Instead, I'll be doing the following:

-hopefully avoiding further speeding tickets while I chauffeur the rest of the week;
-spend some quality time with the kids after daycamp this week,
-shop for a new wardrobe for my guy as he's purged his closet
-locate a light fixture for the kitchen so we can finish the darn renovation before the start of the next decade
-source new cabinetry for the laundry/utility room
-enjoy the few weeks of vacation my husband has booked this summer and
-focus on him during our anniversary getaway in August

That's what counts. I need to get more real.

Because HE** is what is real. And I am so lucky.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

Weekly Winners # 27

Beautiful gardens at U.B.C.




Kids wrestling, forehead style

On your mark, get set ...




For other Weekly Winners check out the home of Sarcastic Mom

Friday, July 04, 2008

Haiku Friday - Family Vacay


Yup I've been away
Five days in Vancouver sun
Third year in a row

Kids love this city
And all it has to offer
Plus gorgeous weather

And we had such fun
Saw new things this time around
Pics and the story...

Sequoia Grill lunch
Stanley Park in its glory
Beaches and ice cream





Jazz Fest in the Park
Lemonade and Cerveza
Music to the ears

Cactus Club Cafe
Canadian Iron Chef
with Me and the Boy




Mini haiku - Boy's shirt
(Eurocup Soccer
This is the year of red Spain
Germany is sad)

Grouse Mountain top views
Lumberjack show and wet T's
On the guys, I mean

Grizzly bears playing
in natural habitat
Birds in Motion, too






Metropolitan
Hotel we're just so spoiled
Suite deal was perfect

Swimming was a hit
A must-have when you have kids
Family time rocks




Diva at the Met
Great food but a tad pricey
Okay for a treat

Cool Kitsilano
Sophie's Cosmic Cafe lunch
Great food, and Elvis



Canada Day sweet
Hyperactive here we come
But who can resist?


Nitobe Garden
Beautiful memorial
Even boy felt zen


Robson street dinner
Upstairs at Earl's with cousin
Girl slept, boy ate -- nice

Robson street shopping
Plenty, Lulu, Shifeon
Cannot stop the shop

Art Gallery show
Anime, cartoons, vid-games
Souvenirs galore

Lunch at the cafe
White wine, Orange crush and milk
Wonderful last day


Only one hitch though
Visit and notice was short
Next should be longer

To meet new blogpals
Cool Women of the west coast
So I WILL be back

LinkWithin

Blog Widget by LinkWithin