Too Young

"Baby, baby, baby ohh
Like Baby, baby, baby noo
Like Baby, baby, baby ohh
I thought you'd always be mine (mine)"

The teeny bopper voice emanated from the dashboard as we drove along the highway to visit family this weekend. We could hear my little 5 year old singing along, see the top of her head bobbing with the beat.

"Guppy, do you like Justin Bieber?", asked the man from the wheel.

"No. I just like his songs. I don't like him." replied the girlie.

Good answer.

"Mommy, Katie likes Justin Bieber and says that she's going to marry him. I told her that she wasn't going to marry him, because she wasn't even going to meet him!"

"Dream crusher!!", laughed her brother.

"No. I'm just telling her the truth, right Mama? Katie said she knows, but when she says she knows, I don't think she really knows, because she says that all the time about everything and she can't know everything just because she says she does - she actually doesn't really know."

Did you catch that?

The things that come out of a 5 year old pragmatist.

When I was 5, I too, had dreams of marrying someone older.


And he grew up to be the 2009 champion of Dancing with the Stars.

I'm crushed.

Friday Fragments - So many posts, so little time

(say hi to my Pal Mrs 4444 while you're there)

I have so many thoughts and ideas floating around and wish I could capture them as soon as they appear. Usually by the time I get some blog time, though, I draw blanks. Or fragments, so here we are...

*****

I still feel the uncomfortable weight of my lardy beef tourtiere dinner from last night, in the bottom of my gut. It was so good that I couldn't stop when I should have.

The bonus was that I didn't even cook it. Anything tastes better when you don't make it yourself.

So it was worth it.

*****

We had a wonderful weekend away last week. We travelled north to stay at the lovely resort that we stayed at over Labour day last year. I was in such a different place back then - and I can't believe it was only months ago. Months! It seems like it was light years.

What a great time to connect with my kids, though, and more importantly, with my husband again. Our business travel these past few months has been absolutely crazy. Ships passing in the night, that's what we are. And then the nights that we are home together, the kids are staying up so late that we pretty much pass out as soon as they're in bed as well. To sleep. So sad.

The weather was gorgeous, the hotel was gorgeous, the food was great, I attended a Yogalates class and I managed to read a BOOK! An almost 500 page book, by the way, that I picked up on Friday to read in time for my book club meeting on Wednesday.

(image from amazon.com)

It was probably not a great a read as I thought it was at the time. But for me, just to have had the time to spend lying by the pool to get through it, was heavenly.

*****

Speaking of pool, I was lamenting the fact that my ass now looks flatter than ever. I guess buoyant butt is not synonymous with 40-something mom, even on the best of days. But I've always considered that one of my best features (without any hint of conceit, of course), and I had to mention my dismay to my husband.

Geez, gravity is really hitting me, and my best feature too! *Sob*.

My husband replied, "What is my best feature?"

Hear the crickets?

He laughed.

"Well, I was thinking! I don't know, it's a tough one to narrow down!", I laughed back at him.

A little too little, and a lot too late.

But we had a good laugh over it. After all, we both know what we looked like in our heyday, so at least we have the memories.

Sigh.

*****

So my favourite, Lee DeWyze won American Idol. His reaction was priceless - he seems like such a sweet boy.

But what a disappointment his performance was on Tuesday - I guess the nerves got the best of him. Crystal really outdid him, big time. And I'm not sure "Beautiful Day" is the best song choice for his new single - Bono he is not.

I guess at the end of the day, they both win. With Simon being the biggest winner of all, of course.

*****

The weather has been just scorchers, so we're hoping for some relief. My mom's birthday is this weekend, and we'll have a celebration. I got her 4 boxes of her favourite crispy thin crackers. If her reaction to her Mother's Day gift is any indication, (5 of her most favourite, hard-to-find- non-scratch kitchen sponges! "The best gift ever!") I think she'll like her birthday present too! No Chanel perfume for this one!

Have a good one!

Friday Fragments - Reality Bytes

"This milk tastes like the farm!"

"Yeah, this tastes funny, Dad."

Every night before bed, the kids have a glass of milk. And the parents, walking around robotically on auto-pilot, go through the motions pouring, preparing and serving their kidlets, around the same time every evening.

So on this night, the Dad went back to check the milk bag, and sure enough, it smelled like it had come from another part of a cow. He poured the kids another cup.

"Actually, when I drank my tea it smelled sort of funny. But I thought it was just the mug, and there were no curdles, so I just drank it! "(I was just happy that someone else had made it for me, if we're to be perfectly honest).

"Well, I DID think it tasted sort of like A-S-S," he said as he sat down.

"What's A-S-S?" asked girlie.

"Um, that's another word for farm."

*****

Speaking of ass, can you believe what I bought at our local Costco? Rock & Republic jeans - not kidding!

I was going on and on about the great deal while the boys were sitting at the kitchen island. And the man said," I like those jeans that you have on now".

And the boy said, "Dad, are you checking out Mom's butt?" with a mischevious giggle.

The man had to admit it- "You got me" and we all burst out laughing.

I guess I've still got it, according to the one who counts anyway. And that's a good thing.

*****

So yes, I'm still standing after a very stressful week. There's nothing quite like waking up at 5 AM every morning, before the sun rises. A colleague told me that might be a sign of menopause. How lovely - hot flashes during one of the most important meetings of my career.

I think I'm good now, though. Back to a regular sleep schedule and looking forward to a lovely long weekend. Summer can't come soon enough.

*****

My guilty pleasure continues to be reality TV: hooked on American Idol and Celebrity Apprentice. I know to some that this season's American Idol may be the season of suck, but I am a really big fan of Lee DeWyze. Something about that cute crooked smile and raspy voice - but I remain particularly touched by his supportive parents. I imagine how I would be just over the moon proud of my kids if they were in that situation. I think I'm getting old, and not so much cougar old - how cool is he to perform classics from Simon & Garfunkel and Lynyrd Skynyrd?



Do you think I've sunk to a new low having my son PVR Oprah's interview of Bret Michaels? I've become a huge fan of his since his appearance on Trump's show. I've never been a heavy metal, Poison chick - but I guess you can never say never :). Go Bret Go.

****

Happy Victoria Day to my Canadian friends - happy planting and fireworks and all that fun long weekend stuff! And a great weekend to everyone.

Friday Fragment Brain Dump

I heard the phrase "brain dump" at work the other day. I found it appropriate for today's post. There's all sorts of stuff that needs dumping.

****

Guess what I'm doing every five words? I'm flipping pancakes. Yes, because I am making fresh pancakes for the kids this morning, a busy weekday morning, because of guilt. I am traveling for work tomorrow and won't be able to do this on a weekend morning. And whether they really want them or not, they're getting them. Yes, I'm being selfish. Making these flapjacks is more about me than it is about them.

Excuse me while I flip... literally and metaphorically, of course.

*****

The boy freaked before his piano lesson on Tuesday. Do you think it was because his sister freaked LAST Tuesday? (You know, they do schedule these events, don't they?) Turns out he isn't feeling particularly musical and was getting bored, and felt he wasn't making progress... which he shared after tears and after his music teacher pulled it out of him. I told you she was wonderful, didn't I? She told him she'd be bored too if they stayed with the book he was on and she's moving him up next week.

The girl freaked before swimming lessons last night. And even after I talked her into it, got her dressed, brought her to the pool, onto the pool deck... she started bawling and freaking again. I pretty much lost it with her.

I mean, seriously? After a stressful day at work, rushing to pick them up before the 6PM deadline at daycare, getting her home and dressed for a 6:15 lesson, getting her there at 6:17 PM and having her cry on the pool deck that it isn't fun for her and she doesn't feel like it? With another 20 things to do before I get on a plane tomorrow.

Who is this not fun for?

So I dragged her back into the change room, the boy met us outside, we piled into the van, and I took them to do my errands, including filling my gas tank so we wouldn't run out.

I subjected my kids to a bit of a be-atch rant in the car. I mean, honestly, could they not let me have one night where I wouldn't be stressed to the gills beyond the already sky high work-induced pressure? "Well Mom, that was Wednesday night, right?"

Where did my kid learn how to be such a smart-ass?

By the time we got home and I got dinner on the table, it was already 8 PM and the hubs walked in the door. Yeah, he'd been gone all week of course.

*****

So on the rest of today's agenda...packing the kids' snacks, the boy's lunch, rushing to the office to make the last minute arrangements for my trip (and holding my breath for the next thing that will hit today, it's been one of those months), making the virtual grocery list in my head, trying to figure out what birthday present to get for the son's friend for TOMORROW and for the next 3 parties for that matter, and fitting a hair appt in there somewhere, as my head is a total wreck...

*****
Yes indeed, I really had time for this post. But it was cathartic.

Thanks for reading, if you managed to get through my maniacal ramblings.

Wish me luck. On the hair, I mean.

And I guess a few other things too, while you're at it.

Have a great weekend.

Happy M Day

"I started a blog."

"Really, you did? When? "

"Yeah. On Mother's Day. You're the only one who knows about it, other than Ian."

"Hah! Karen, you're SUPPOSED to tell people about it!"

That was a conversation between myself and my tech savvy IT brother. About a blog that I started 5 Mother's Days ago. About my thoughts, my ramblings, my weirdnesses all captured on the internetz for at first, just me ... but eventually the whole 'nuther world.

My girl was just under 5 months old. My boy had just turned 5. I was exhausted and sleep deprived (you can tell here.) But I liked to read. And I loved to write. I think I've learned to write a bit better through the process. Not so much lately, though.

Because at five years older, not necessarily wiser -- I am still exhausted and sleep deprived.

But a very happy mother nonetheless.




Hope all you Mamas out there had a wonderful day!

Of passing bugs and passing notes...

What do you do when a stomach bug hits your household with a 103 deg fever vengeance not only once, but twice within a week?

You scramble with your work schedule and intersperse it with not-so-fleeting moments of guilt and worry.

The first incident concerns you because it knocks your little girl out so badly that all she wants to do is sleep, snuggled next to you in your king size bed as her Daddy is out of town. You wonder if she's got appendicitis, or if it's an ear infection, or if it's the flu. And then you breathe a huge sigh of relief as she bounces back the next day without a hint of a temperature, extremely happy with your suggestion that she stay home from school another day... "so I don't get the other kids sick, right Mama?"

When your son calls you at the office from school five days later, complaining of a sore tummy and feeling "very hot", you're super-thrilled to have hit the viral lottery twice- how wonderful.

You scramble again, taking all your important documents and your laptop, throwing them into your bag, rushing out to pick him up, wishing that they could have at least had the courtesy to get sick at the same time. Wishing that it didn't always have to be you to get them when they're sick. How inconvenient, when you've got such critical, actually hugely critical stuff happening at work...and you should be nominated for Mother-of-the Year for thinking that way of course.

And then you see your boy all flushed and sweaty as he sits there patiently waiting for you in the school office. His sweet, sad face with the look that says "I need my Mom and only Mom can make me feel better". And his voice that utters, "I'm so sorry Mom, I didn't mean to bother you at work, I know you're really busy".

And the guilt and the worry strikes you all over again.

But as the three of you climb into the van, he opens the palm of his hand toward you, showing a small slip of paper with writing on it. "Look at this Mom, I got this from Sally today in class", he says quietly, with a hint of a smile in his voice.

And there, scribbled in Gr. 4 handwriting, is the following:


"Will you come to the movies with me? Circle YES NO "

You're floored. And a bit tickled. But so not ready for this.

"I tried to answer her, Mom, but she kept running away. Actually, she didn't even hand it to me, she had Shawna do it for her."

"Well, what would you have said?" you ask with extreme curiosity, not knowing how to react, or how you should react.

"Oh, I'm not sure. Actually, I feel sorta gross right now, can we go home?"

And that's it.

You get him home, tuck him into bed, and he places the note on his bedside table. And then his little sister picks up the note and reads it to you.

"Well Mommy, I think he should circle NO. He's too young to go to the movies with her!", she whispers without any guilt or worry.

So who's the Mom again?