In the last 60 days or so...
-I've had 2 gall bladder attacks;
-I've been part of a family going at warp speed in a medical situation;
-I sprained my knee, which now appears to be mildly osteoarthritic;... good bye beloved bodyjam?? $hi^, fack and all that stuff????!!!
-I lost my father.
I'm starting to think that my 40's really, really suck.
This is also high travel season for my husband's work. He's cut back, but in reality, if he were to attend every work event that he could, he'd be gone 110% of the time. Last week was tough. Ian took the red-eye home so he could be back Saturday morning. Still, it was a lonely week, after having spent a lonely week only about five days before.
Yesterday marked the one month anniversary of my Dad's passing. I thought about him as I watched the Oscars last night. He loved that stuff. I come by my obsession with all things entertainment quite honestly. I'm hoping that he's partying with Paul Newman and making friends with Heath. You never know.
I know MY lonely is nothing compared to that of my mother's. It's unbearable for me to even think about...I want to help unload her grief, her sadness. I just don't know how.
I guess they say that times of crisis make you re-evaluate your life. This big hole has left me looking for answers to questions that I don't even know to ask. Are the things we depend on, our foundations, even able to withstand life's uncertainties? I'd like to think so.