Thursday, July 02, 2009

So now what do we do?

My kids get away with a lot. They're good kids, but they know how to work the system.

Take my daughter, for example. She's four AND A HALF now, she's quick to point out. And she just graduated from junior kindergarten. In September she'll be a "senior".

But get this; she has her own room, complete with her own pretty bed...which she hasn't slept in since she was three.

Where has she been sleeping, pray tell?

Why, in her Mom and Dad's room, on the couch next to their bed. Mommy and Daddy need T-shirts with "LOSERS" blazoned across them.

How did this happen? Well, she used to go to bed pronto right a 8 PM, we'd tuck her in with her stuffed guys, give her a kiss good night, and she'd be good. No drama for the night.

But she started getting up in the middle of the night and crawling into bed with us. And then before we knew it, she was spending most of the night in bed with us... so our new rule was, get in the couch, if you're coming into our room.

Then somehow we ended up being too tired, and she weaseled her way into getting tucked into the couch right away, bypassing the whole bedroom ritual entirely. (I suspect it was the hubs that allowed this to happen on a night while I was out. Yeah, I blame him for everything, and this is no exception. No willpower against girls who have certain grown men wrapped around their cutie little fingers). And to be honest, there's something just too sweet about hearing your little girl's gentle breathing next to you.

It just became habit.

But this was ridiculous. It's just bad news to lose the sanctity of your own bedroom. It can't be good for a marriage. Bad enough that kids invade your entire consciousness, let alone your sub and then total unconsciousness.

She promised, though, that she would go back to her room, eventually. Before she was ten at least. Well, that argument didn't fly, so she deferred it to her sleepover with her baby cousin, which was two weekends ago. She slept in her room, with her cousin in the playpen beside her. Not a single hitch.

It was beautiful.

But guess what? She went right back to our couch the next day. Grrrrr. And I have little energy to fight.

So here comes my little hero.

"G, if I sleep next to you on the air mattress in your room, will you stay in your bed?."

"Yay, it will be like a sleepover. Yay Goh-Goh, I will, I will sleep there all the night if you're next to me!" she shouted with glee. Literally jumping up and down and clapping.

Her last words to me as she faded into sleep this past Monday were,

"Mommy, if Goh-Goh sleeps here with me forever, then it's okay, I'll sleep in my own bed."

And she did.

And she has every night now, since Monday.

With her big brother by her side.

I asked my boy on Tuesday if he wanted to go back to his room. He replied,

"Uh, no, not just yet. It's comforting hearing her next to me sleeping. It's okay Mommy. I'll let you know when I'm ready to go back."

Where did we get this kid?

And so his Mommy thanks him. And his Daddy too.

Because of him, we've got our bedroom back.

Not that we've got the energy to do anything with this new scenario, but it's the principle right?


Tenakim said...

wow- he's a keeper- that's too sweet!

Ginaagain said...

He's a very sweet boy and she's got him wrapped around her finger too!

louann said...

Oh that's is so, so sweet! Cute little guy.

I need a "LOSERS" t-shirt too. Haven't slept in the same bed with my husband since I don't know when!

Karen said...

We are right there with you, wearing our big Loser shirts. Our 6 year old is still sleeping in our bed (we carry him to his own after he falls asleep) and this past week he has finally decided that falling asleep in big brother's bed is good.

Here's hoping that both our kids continue and that we can lose the Loser shirts.

Tara R. said...

G is an awesome kid and a great big brother!

Hubs and I were LOSERS too for years, thankfully the youngest decided on his own to finally sleep in his own room. Now, we have two 80lb Labs taking up half the bed. *sigh*

Candice said...

Hey whatever works, right? :)

...and everything nice said...

Soooo sweet:) Yeah. our girls all THREE sleep in our room. 2 on the floor 1 in our bed. Craziness!

Badness Jones said...

Pick me up one of those LOSER t-shirts while you're at it, k? Not that the kids sleep in our room....because I spend half the night in theirs. But now that the boy has his own giant queen-sized bed (a serendipitous bequest, we didn't buy it) the girlie spends half the nights in it with him and I'm getting the occasional night with Hubs in our room. Bliss.

Mrs4444 said...

What a wonderful boy. So sweet. I'm happy for all of you :)

Mrs4444 said...

P.S. Just in case, in a couple of weeks, I would get the couch out of the bedroom. When she protests, you could just matter of factly say, "You are a big girl who sleeps in her own bed now. You aren't going to need the couch any more."

You could also say something like..."Now that you are sleeping in your own bed, Mommy and Daddy realize how much we love having our Mommy-Daddy time alone. Thank you for being a big girl. I want you to know that if you come to my room at night now, we will tell you you must go to sleep in your own room." That sets a boundary between kids and parents; one that she needs, whether she likes it or not. She might test it, but be firm and you should only have to enforce it once or twice before she accepts it.

All of that said, though, I think she's going to stay in her bed :)

Tooj said...

Oh my gosh, what a wonderful boy you have. :) And it sounds like your daughter is willing to compromise. What a great trait. (I blame the hubby for most everything myself.)

Yo Momma said...

omg. I love your boy. he's so sweet and loves his lil' sis!


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