The bride used to work for me. She inherited me when I came back from my first maternity leave. We'd only met a couple of times before, and apparently I made her nervous for weeks before my arrival. Fancy that! I was her first manager in her first job out of university. And here we are, eight years later and she’s getting married.
Along with being her boss, we got on fabulously as friends. We got quite close both professionally and personally. I am so proud of how well she’s done in her career, but then I saw early on in her, the quiet, shy confidence that I knew would blossom at some point. Reminded me of someone I knew way back when (who would grow up to be dragon-lady boss, apparently ;). We discussed our relationships. I shared with her some of my own trials and tribulations. Some guys are just a lot harder to get to the altar for whatever reason. But they are worth the wait. My guy happened to be one of them (I’m airing this for the whole www; and he’s not even AWAY this time!). For whatever reason, we were a bit of an inspiration to her that things could work out.
At the shower, I was sitting next to a pretty young woman. She lamented a bit that she wasn't currently seeing anyone. I did the annoying older woman thing, " Hey, you should have the bride set you up (what, am I a freakin' grandma now?!)". To which she replied, "Are you kidding, I've been trying, and we've been having NO luck!".
I found out through conversation that she's doing well in her career, has a car, her own condo, and she's very well-travelled. I told her that she should be all set then, any guy would love her. Funnily enough, she said that her situation hinders her rather than helps... a lot of guys are intimidated, and don't like that she's so headstrong and independent. Some are looking for another mother (ick). The singles' scene is so difficult once you're out of school. She's still looking for her Prince Charming. I told her not to seek a Prince, not to look too hard because once she stops trying so earnestly, someone will come along. I really believe that.
I don't think I was ready for marriage until I came to the realization that Ian wasn't my Prince Charming. He didn't want to be. Rescue me, from what? Too much pressure. Life isn't a fairy tale. Sure, he was hawt and everything, but a long-term relationship takes more than hotness. Heat fades (heated floors for the kitchen do help), but if you're lucky, that initial spark can evolve into a real, long-lasting partnership.
At the end of the shower, the groom came by and delivered to his bride a lovely bouquet of roses. Handed it to her with a kiss. That was such a sweet gesture; they looked so happy, so ready to embark on this journey called marriage. I had to smile.
We're coming up to our 15th wedding anniversary this summer. I don't get roses anymore. I don't need them. Don't get me wrong, I still love romantic gestures. But my guy re-arranges his busy business trip itinerary this morning, in order that he can fly home in time to stay with the kids. Just so that I can attend my Tuesday night gym class. Because he knows how much I love it and how important it is to me.
Call me a sap, but I think this is true love. Maybe I'll have to grind some flaxseed for his cereal now.
Ain't senior love sweet?